Tag Archives: Snuggies

Throwing Darts in 2011: Prediction Time

Here we go on my annual predictions for the upcoming college football season. I peer into my crystal viking horn and blow out what I think will happen for the year 2011.  From the BCS Championship Game to what color socks Oregon will wear in week 10, I throw it all on the board and see what makes triples and doubles.  So what do I think will happen?  Let’s find out:

  • Going big, the BCS Championship Game will be between Alabama and Oregon.  Alabama’s avoided the NCAA cartel but Oregon hasn’t as much.  I’m taking a risk on Oregon, but I don’t see any other team outside of the SEC that is title worthy.  Sure there’s Oklahoma but man I’ve been burned by them before.
  • Texas A&M will leave the Big 12 to go the SEC.  The SEC will poach and ACC, probably Florida State.  The Big 12 stays in Texas and nabs either SMU or Houston.
  • Mike Leach will show up in a pirate outfit on Halloween.  I’m not sure where, but it will be damn scary.
  • The NCAA hires enough people for them to actually do their job.  This is a big guess.
  • The first ever Big 10 Championship Game will feature new member Nebraska and current NCAA crosshairs, Ohio State.  Ohio State wins it and causes everyone to freak out.
  • Like I said before, Oregon will win the inaugural Pac 12 Championship Game against Arizona State.
  • Tyler Gabbert will not be a starting quarterback.
  • In my Big 12 preview, I picked Oklahoma to win the Big 12 but they will not be undefeated and will choke against somebody.
  • Super recruiter Willie Lyles will be paid even more money by selling recruiting tapes of a young breakout by the name of Hershel Walker.
  • I have no friggin’ clue who will win the Heisman this year.  Probably LaMichael James, he was a finalist last year.  Yeah, so was Andrew Luck but I’m picking the Ducks over the Trees this year.
  • Notre Dame gets on the winning track this year by displaying a tall video tower at the end of the opponents field for each home game.  They may, by the grace of God, make a BCS bowl this year.
  • Penn State head coach Joe Paterno will NOT die on the field this.  I’ve tried hard with this in the past but I need my prediction average to go up.
  • Kansas fans will start asking about basketball season after the 1st quarter of the first football game this year.
  • The Longhorn Network will not be successful to begin with.  Texas finishing in the middle of the Big 12/10/9 will force ESPN to dump a bunch of infomercials on it.  Hook ‘Em Horns Turbo Snakes anyone?  There’s already Snuggies.
  • TCU will step on Boise State’s neck the only year they are together in the Mountain West Conference.
  • This whole mess with players not getting enough resources to go through college will stop.  We’ll see at cost scholarships show up so the players can get a stipend to pay for laundry and lap dances.
  • One of the Brown brothers will do good, the other one will be mediocre for Kansas State.  Still, the Wildcats make a bowl.
  • Craig James will still be a douche.
  • Erin Andrews will get bumped off the top sideline hottie list.  At least there’s naked pictures of her online.
  • The Ivy League, after limiting collision practice and targeting head injuries, will be the first conference to go all flag football.  No one will care.
  • And finally, I will get used to being in a different town.  Kansas City was nice and Austin is turning out to be pretty cool.  I also predict that I will not miss the snow but will miss the snow days.